RICHMOND, VA—Employees of the local Golden Corral were stunned this past Sunday when Jeff Masters, 32, entered the buffet restaurant and did not gorge himself on every possible food concoction available. Restaurant employee Sarah Williams said, “I had never seen anything like it before. It was after church so there were a lot of people, and most of them went back up to the buffet five times. After he went up a second time, he only came back with a salad. And he only ate half of it.” Witnesses say that Jeff had no good reason for any of this. The endless chocolate fountain wasn’t malfunctioning, and there was plenty of gooey cheese to put on top of the fried chicken thighs. “I don’t know. I mean I was pretty hungry during the sermon—it was the one about Jesus feeding all the people with a loaf of bread—but when I got there, I just wasn’t as hungry. So I ate until I was almost full.” Lance Trenary, President and CEO, couldn’t be reached for comment at this time.
